Hi,
You can create a characteristic with 4 values, the first one being the "please select".
Then, after you add the characteristic to the product, select the "please select" value as the default value of the characteristic and then, click on the "manage variants" button and edit the variant for the "please select" value and set a quantity of 0.
That way the default one will be "please select" and it won't display the add to cart button until the user select something else in the characteristic dropdown.